It’s also not bad to be mindful.
I often have a tendency to label events, outcomes, emotions and thoughts as good or bad. When I use labels I become the label. In so doing I am mostly living in the past or the future. For example, when I label colon cancer as a bad thing, I’m wanting a future without cancer. If cancer is bad, all my thoughts, emotions and actions are held with that belief.
Same thing if I label happiness as good. As long as I believe I am happy and ignore any other thoughts, emotions and actions, then I think that’s a good way to be.
The Truth is there is no coulda, woulda, shoulda in mindfulness. That’s the pure beautiful essence of being aware in the present. No need to label anything. No need to make judgements about anything or anyone. No need to fix the past. No need to worry about the future. Observe what I am thinking or feeling, accept it now, and let it go recognizing it as temporary.
What’s left is only now. The present moment. The only one that matters. And when I reside in the present, all thoughts, emotions and actions are created in that moment and not as a result of what my past was or I hope my future will be. I am at peace with myself and everyone around me.
So let’s talk a little about colon cancer. Having had throat cancer three times in the 80’s I have a past with cancer. At that time, being the dimly lit dimwit I was, I was angered, depressed, pitied myself, stubborn about treatment, refused radiation after the 2nd occurrence, and definitely believed it was a bad thing. With the colon cancer diagnosis, my mind immediately went to my past cancer experiences, wanting to emulate past thoughts, emotions and actions.
I feel grateful this time that I am practicing mindfulness which allows me to accept what is more easily rather than being gripped by fear, or sadness, or depression. That’s not to say I don’t feel fearful, sad or depressed. If and when I do I practice observing it, accepting it as temporary, and letting it go. I use the app Calm daily for guided mindful meditations.
Focusing on the in breath and out breath is a huge help to stay present.
It’s interesting in that I feel I’m in this big unending totally safe kaleidoscope. All things are temporary except for the source of light which is always shining within and without. Whatever happens in the kaleidoscope stays in the kaleidoscope! The light is eternal. I am eternal. You are eternal. We are all love.
Peace
