Good News Bad News

It’s been 9 days since the surgery and 6 days since I was released from the hospital. The surgery went well and I was out of the hospital in 3 days. Mayo is now using a 72 hour anesthetic which keeps pain levels down. They also had me on a Ketamine drip which made me very loopy.

I was up and walking the day after surgery and I had my first blended meal. Mayo encourages eating right away in small amounts to assist the colon to get started again. By the 3rd day I passed gas and the next day had my first bowel movement. Tummy is still pretty sore. I take Vicodin to help with the pain.

Nalani has been a loving caregiver. She fed me in the hospital. She helps me eat at the hotel as well as doing all the phone calls to doctors and all the domestic stuff. Without her I’d be struggling a lot more.

I’ve walked a little bit each day. I’m eating full meals now. Being in pain has been a struggle. There hasn’t been much joy in mudville. In fact I experienced quite a bit of anger. Anger that after 14 years of fresh food blended meals, a strong exercise program and having a wonderful spirit, I get colon cancer. What the f**k? Roughly 100,000 people a year get colon cancer. I can check that off my bucket list!

The bad news is that the pathology report came back showing that the cancer had spread to 2 of 20 lymph nodes. The tumor itself grew into the wall of the colon but did not break through it. Chemotherapy will probably be recommended. An appointment has been set with an oncologist on January 10 to discuss it all. Happy Birthday to me! Chemo is the birthday gift I’ve always wished for.

Can you tell I’m a bit depressed about it all? As they say, this too shall pass. Truthfully I’m so sick of hearing that expression. I was hoping to return to wonderful Honolulu on January 7th, but will now be delayed at least another week. God I’m sick of this hotel room, of being in the desert, and having to deal with all this crap.

Nalani, thank you being my saving grace. For all those who sent best wishes thank you for your loving kindness. I’m mindful each day about how to be with the experience. The light is there but it is a bit dimmer presently than it has been. I’m having difficulty finding the light switch to trip the light, break the night, and see with new eyes. This too shall pass.

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